You love him still.

But he doesn’t feel the same anymore.

It may take time to fully process the end of a romantic relationship and unloving someone can be a challenging and emotionally complex process, but there are steps you can take to help yourself move forward.

Here are the nine steps on how to start anew:

  1. Accept your feelings: Acknowledge that you still have lingering emotions for this person. It’s normal to experience a range of emotions after a breakup or when trying to unlove someone. Cry, be mad, eat something you crave, shut your social media world, and sleep. Just accept that you still love that person, yes. Absorb all the feelings that you encounter. Call his name repeatedly.
  2. Create distance: Limit contact with the person as much as possible. This includes avoiding social media stalking, unfollowing or muting them, and minimizing any face-to-face interactions. Creating physical and emotional distance can help you gain perspective and start the healing process.
  3. Focus on self-care: Start with waking up early, exercise, and take a bath. Prioritize self-care activities that bring you joy and promote your well-being. Engage in hobbies, spend time with loved ones, practice mindfulness or meditation, and take care of your physical and mental health. Invest time in activities that help you grow as an individual.
  4. Reflect on the relationship: Take time to reflect on the relationship and identify any negative aspects or patterns that may have contributed to its end. Remind yourself of the reasons why it’s better to move on and focus on personal growth.
  5. Surround yourself with support: Seek support from friends, family, or a therapist who can offer guidance and lend a listening ear. Sharing your feelings with others who care about you can help alleviate some of the emotional burden.
  6. Set boundaries: Establish clear boundaries with the person you’re trying to unlove. Communicate your intentions and needs, and if necessary, limit or cut off contact entirely to allow yourself the space to heal.
  7. Redirect your focus: Find new interests and activities that capture your attention and redirect your thoughts away from the person. Engaging in new experiences can help you create a fresh outlook and open up possibilities for new connections and personal growth.
  8. Practice self-compassion: Be patient and kind to yourself throughout the process. Healing takes time, and it’s okay to have setbacks or moments of sadness. Treat yourself with compassion and remind yourself that it’s a natural part of the journey.
  9. Consider professional help: If you find it particularly challenging to unlove someone or you’re struggling with intense emotions, it may be beneficial to seek professional help from a therapist or counselor. They can provide guidance and support tailored to your specific situation.